Monday, December 31, 2012

LET IT GO

 Should some things and people be forgotten? Sometimes it's just best to let it go.

“Should old acquaintances be forgotten, and never brought to mind? Should old acquaintances be forgotten, and auld lang syne?”  

These all too familiar words will be sung loud and joyously when the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve. Many will sing, but I’d bet few will ponder their meaningfulness and their true cause for pause. The poet who originally penned the song in the 17th century was expressing his ponderings about letting go of lingering memories from a relationship that had ended. However, over the centuries the meaning changed as it became customary to sing “Auld Lang Syne” as the old year ends and the new one rolls in. But, if you think about it, whether we’re talking relational or situational, these are really great questions, and I believe they bear considering when it comes to forgetting about the past.
For instance, if old “stuff” is clouding our heads, hearts or direction, stuff we should have forgotten about long ago, the answer to “should we forget?” is easy. If we have allowed negative thoughts to take up residence in our minds, and permitted unhealthy ponderings to stay way, way too long, the answer to whether “should some things never be brought to mind?” is obvious.  If thoughts, ideas, actions or people, i.e., “acquaintances” and “things” from the past are negative and crippling, the answer is a resounding YES. It just makes sense to let it go.

If we would admit it, most of us can say that at some time we’ve carried too many harmful memories with us over time; memories that are laden in our pasts and that have absolutely no current value. Memories that serve us well when we think of them, visions that make us chuckle, feel happy, that remind us of significant lessons and accomplishments, the ones that make us feel proud are the ones to hang onto. The relationships that were not healthy, the situations that went sour or failed, the things that people have done or said that harmed and hurt, all of the bad stuff that you continually let swirl in your head, negative words from others that you replay and replay need to be dumped and NEVER BROUGHT TO MIND. Should they be forgotten? Absolutely yes, and let it go.
Letting go can be a challenge, but if your memories are draining you of life or preventing you  from moving ahead in a healthy, happy direction toward love, living, career, fun, friendships and a “free” existence, it’s time to consider a “DUMP DAY”.  Make the time to take a walk through your mind, look around at your circumstances, evaluate your life and ask “should this ‘acquaintance’ be forgotten? Should this “memory of things long past” be forgotten?  If the memories that come to mind have little value, are old and useless, if they are holding you down or back from your aspirations, dreams or freedom, by all means LET IT GO. DUMP THEM. Literally, say to yourself, “I’m letting it go.” See yourself taking your “LOAD” of unhealthy and unhappy thoughts and memories to the DUMPSTER or GARBAGE BIN and throwing them in, one by one.

You may be surprised the results.  It’s like spring cleaning.  Look under, around and inside the recesses of your mind for all of the dusty, crappy old thoughts that don’t belong there anymore. Sound crazy? Try it and see what you THINK.

I have a friend that took it to another level. A few holidays ago, I suggested “the dump” exercise to a her.  She was trying to put a relationship behind her, and so she literally took every reminder that she had of her ex, and put it in a box and wrote on it “I’m letting you go”. She came to my door and showed me the box, and then headed to the dumpster. She was smiling when she made her announcement to me, and she had a revived pep in her step as she headed toward the garbage bin.

I watched her from the distance as she thrust that box high and hard over into the bin. She wanted to forget and she really meant it. In fact, she moved away. She found a new job. She bought a new car. She is pursuing her dream. She didn’t go back looking through the old garbage. Her old thoughts, old memories and an old relationship no longer held her back. She moved on, no days of “auld lang syne” blocking her vision or her view of things to come.

So, should old acquaintances and times long past be forgotten? If they are hindering you, yes, for sure. My friend is proof positive that the “forgetting exercise” really can work. It doesn’t have to be about an ex, however. You can box-up WHATEVER it is that you want to dump, and get rid of it. Write out what you’re dumping on index cards, and toss them in a box or garbage bag . It may take a day, a week or a month to get the “mess” out of your mind and written down, but try it. You may see results faster than you can say bye-bye.
“Should old acquaintances be forgotten, and never brought to mind, and old days gone by?”  Yes, the truly old and useless matters of the mind and heart should be forgotten, dumped, discarded and disposed of. Then, we should do our best to look optimistically forward and toward the future with the hope of creating new moments, relationships and memories that we can appreciate and enjoy.  Don’t hang onto people and things of the past that bring fret and regret to mind. Don’t allow sour, old acquaintances and depressing, lingering memories from long ago continue to bring you low. DON’T allow yourself to keep looking back. LET IT GO. LET IT GO. LET IT GO!

Silver Rae Fox - Copyrights 2013

Silver Rae Fox is the host of the Blog Talk Radio Show “FOXOLOGY”.  Click here for more info on show times: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/foxology/2013/01/01/do-resolutions-really-work

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