Wednesday, September 11, 2019


It's a tough thing when you look in the mirror at yourself and realize that if you want things in your life to be different, it's actually you that needs to change first. Often, we will lead lives filled with chaos, disorder and confusion not realizing that we are the culprit of it all. How do you know if it's you?

Here are a couple of things to consider that may help you figure it all out:

Are you your own worst enemy?

Sometimes we are really good at tearing ourselves apart, as well as our lives. We have little motivation. We are lazy. We think only "certain people" are destined for the good things in life. We don't want to work for what we want. Our perspective of accomplishment and achievement is skewed by looking at celebrities and those who are extremely wealthy and successful.

Okay, so maybe you have to get up off your butt and put a plan together to get to a happy, healthy place of living by understanding that no one is holding you back but you. What's your desire? What's your dream? What's your gift? What's your talent? What's your passion? Search yourself and see where you land. Look yourself in the face. You can change things. You must make a decision that you will.

Are you guilty of self-sabotage?

There are other circumstances when opportunities are staring us in the face, being handed to us, and we literally destroy those opportunities single-handedly. The theory of self-sabotage simply means we tear down positive, purposeful things that may have helped us or benefited us in one way or many.

How do we stop such self-defeating behavior? Look yourself in the face. Ask "I am the problem?"
It's so easy to blame someone or something else when things fall apart or end, rather that doing a self-check on who is really responsible, especially if we have to point the finger at ourselves. But, if it's you and you know it's you, own up to it. All of us manage to create some of our own crises at some time or another, intentionally and otherwise. Either way, a surefire way to deal with it is to face it, and do whatever is necessary to do what is wiser, and whatever will take us in the direction of correction.

In the face of change...

Indeed, it will take a deliberate, very intentional effort to face the fact that you may be guilty of being your own worst enemy or of self-sabotage, as well as determining how to bulldoze toward a much needed change in how you think. It will largely take complete honesty with yourself. Where you have been blaming others, you will have to stop. Where you have made everybody else accountable and responsible for your forward movement in life, you will have to stop. Where you have been demolishing opportunities, closing doors and running away from the positive things offered to you because they scare you, you will have to stop.

Admittedly, these changes may not happen overnight. One thing I can assure of though is this: The moment you decide to look yourself in the face and know that it's all on you to change, a change is gonna come. The weight of the responsibility shifts to you, but all the wonderful things that will shift in your favor do, too. That is something to look forward to! ~ S.R.F.

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