Get Your Head Right

It seems that everyday that I venture out into these streets, I am sure to see something baffling. It doesn't take me long to realize that people are running on impatience and energy drinks, and that's a bad combination. Twice this week I was almost hit, one driver speeding through a stop sign, and the other ignoring the red light. Y'all do know that these are for our safety, the signals that say STOP? There is no second guessing, these signs mean just what they mean. I believe I was only saved by angels. I shook my head, and thanked God.

I know what it's like to be in a hurry. I get it. I know what it feels like when we're tied to life stuff that has little room for adjustments, especially at a slow pace. We get impatient. But, let me ask you something, how is that going for you? I can imagine your answers.

I'm going to share some pointers on how to handle that stuff. A few insights come to mind. Here goes:

1. You have time, you just have to RE-THINK how you are using it. My greatest flex in life is being FLEXIBLE. If I'm running late for something, I'm definitely not considering running red lights and stop signs, regardless of the situation or issue. I'm pre-thinking about what I need to do or say when I get where I'm going, or maybe even contact someone with the news that I'm running late. That's just one scenario. I know you're saying "Well, that's common sense." Well, EXACTLY! Get your head right and use it, or risk causing an accident or possibly killing yourself and possibly others in your fierce attempt to move faster. Come on, now. Just stop it, so you can stop for those traffic signs, and put a stop to any other abusive or bad behavior created by impatience. 

2. You have choices, you just have to RE-THINK what they are. What about all that yelling, screaming, blaming, hating, chaos and craziness that is showing up in your life? Is it "them", or is it you? Oh, it's them??? I've always loved this quote "don't start nothin' won't be nothin'". And, you know what? I remind myself often of this when the customer service I receive sucks, when a levels of agitation from others spill into the day from almost anywhere, when people are deliberate about their hate and anger toward you, when any number of almost idiotic encounters occur. You feel like cussing and knocking somebody out, but don't do that.

Well, you live and you learn, right? I see way too many fights and disturbances on social media and I scratch my head, seriously I do. You want to smack down and even kill people who just crossed your path, people that you met a few seconds ago? Really? Seriously? Get your head right. It will cost you nothing to say nothing in response to their lack of people skills. It will cost you nothing to walk away with your confidence and emotional intelligence in tact. 

It will cost you nothing if you chose to win with doing nothing, a win by default effort. It's just not worth it to risk something, and possibly everything in a baseless encounter, whether it's with family, friends, co-workers, or some random situations. Regardless of how it started, you can be the one to end it. You must make a choice to do that, because you can if you think first.

3. You can learn patience, you just have to RE-THINK how you handle things. If you have the mindset that conditions you to think that every little mishap is meant to destroy you or destroy your day, let me say this with well-meaning love: get your head right. Stuff is always happening that could catapult you into negativity. You spill your coffee. Your kids have asked you something ten times, and they don't understand while all you do is huff and yell. Work and the people at work exhaust you. Your spouse is annoying. Traffic. Bills. Health. School. Lack of rest. Other people's problems that are now yours, too. Life. Strife. No light at the end of the tunnel. These, and so many more daily aggravations are about to drive you crazy, huh?

You have heard many gurus tell you to stay in the moment, respond with sensibility, take deep breaths, hide for a few minutes, stay focused? They are not lying to you. Techniques absolutely work, but techniques only work with a lot of practice. The key is to make being patient a practice with every opportunity, all of them. Yes, you practice constantly with every perceived negative issue that comes your way and across your path. Constant practice won't really make things perfect, but I guarantee you that you will not only experience a new level of patience, you will experience a new level of peace and perspective. Try it and you will amaze yourself. You will make better decisions. You will feel happier. Your outlook will be better, and so will your "inner" look, the part of yourself that needed to see and treat things differently. It's a game changer. 

Emotional intelligence is a real thing. It's something that can save the day. It's something that can save a marriage. It's something that can save you. When you practice getting your head right, which is what emotional intelligence really is, you can save yourself and everyone in your own little world. People, that's important. ~ S.R.F.